Love & Single Awareness Day

Queer Dirty Laundry's post on "What is L.O.V.E. got me thinking about Single Awareness Day tomorrow.  (Sorry, for those of you in relationships it's Valentine's Day)

Readers of my blog have read plenty about my trials and tribulations in the love department.  Finding love seems like a monumental task at times . . . keeping it seems impossible!

I do believe in love and certainly hope I fall in love again (and fucking keep him!  Bitch is getting tied to the bed, sorry, I digress)  We all know it can be great one day and shitty the next. 

I get frustrated when people confuse love with lust, desire and sex.  Love is more than sex.  Sex is one of the instruments to help keep your loving moving a long.  And when in love you've got to be willing to put up with the good, bad and the ugly.  Guess that's why I haven't been Love's champion over the past 14 months . . . I don't have the patience for dealing with the bad and the ugly.

One of my favorite quotes from the movie Juno sums it up perfectly:

"In my opinion, the best thing you can do is to find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you. The right person will still think that the sun shines out of your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with."-Juno

Your homework for tomorrow if you're in love - remember why it is you fell in love with him/her, why you want to stay with them, and what you're going to do between now and February 14, 2013 not to fuck it up!  After all, us single folk need someone to vicariously live through. :-)

I'M BAAAAACCCCCCKKKK!

Miss me? Sure you did!

So after what seemed like a very long vacation from blogging, I'm back. I've decided I need my "blogging outlet" to let out my rants and the other shit that floats around my head. Trust me, lots of shit floats around up their. I believe I think too much about things . . . but that's another blog post in it self.

So here are so updates from my life since I last posted (in no particular order):

1.) Still working that shitty ass sales job. As too many Americans know, the job market sucks (although Wall St. seems to be doing fine, again, another blog post). I've been searching like crazy and sending my resume out as well. Nothing. No bites, not even a phone interview. I've re-written and improved both my cover letter and resume. Many friends and family members have poured over it too. Still nothing.

2.) Car - I did get one! Driving a 2005 Subaru for the moment. It's in mint condition and had 28,800 miles on it when I got it in April. A small victory in 2011.

3.) Nieces - one just turned 1 years old on Sunday and the other will be 3 years old in February. These kids are great and bring a lot of joy to my life. I visit as often as I can and baby sit as well. Had them both for an entire weekend by myself. 5:30 am each day I would hear "Uncleeeee . . . wakie wakie, eggs and bacy!"

4.)Moving - I moved out of the place my ex and I inhabited on April 1. My living situation is great. While the house is no palace fit for a queen, it is comfy and my roomies are great! They love my dog, we get a long well, rarely do we have an issue. Another small victory in 2011.

5.) Gym - fell off the wagon in September and gained weight all winter long. 14 lbs. ugh. However, I'm back into my routine and will work hard to keep it going. The two majors things to work on in 2012 - A.) New Job and B.) Go to the gym 3-4 times a week or more.

6.) Single - January 1, 2012 marked one year of being single after having been in a 2.5 year long relationship. Shackle free bitches! I was convinced by a friend to go out on a few dates with a friend of his in November. It didn't work out. Let's just say he's passive aggressive and we never even it a title of "boyfriends".

This situation unfortunately reminded me WHY I need not date. I have the time, just not the patience. 99.9% of the men I find in Boston love to play games, don't know what they want or are toddlers in an adult body. Frankly, I don't have the patience to search for that .1% . . .so I say fuck it. I'll stay single, live my life and see if the universe sends something my way without me looking for it. If it doesn't, oh well. Worse things can happen in life.

7.) Baby Coop - is doing just fine. I celebrated his 2nd birthday with him in August . . .during that hurricane we had.

So that's a wrap for now. Until next time . . .

P.S. I hope you like the new layout and color scheme.

P.S.S. and the hot guy posted above. Let's call him my "gynspiration"

Beat Me Over The Head

Ugh! I've been beat over the head with this anger, depression, and complete hopelessness about the future. It feels like the whole world is conspiring against me right now, beyond the end of my relationship.

Did my taxes today - owe about $1,800. Not fucking sure how. I worked for a non-profit last year, aka the working poor. Oh wait, only the rich win. Thanks for fucking me in the ass without a condom and lube Barack and Deval.

Great, because I'm making no fucking money at my new job. And that money would have been oh so useful as I need it for a new place to live. Cardboard box here we come!

I must have been a serial murderer in my previous life because karma or God just loves fucking sticking it to me in 2011. Good guys always finish last, moral of the story people. Just be an asshole to everyone you know. You'll do fine. Just ask TJ.

Michael is my middle name . . .think it's actually misery, thanks Mom & dad.

I mean I have to say, I won't make the same mistake twice. Soo, I won't date anyone close to TJ . . . or maybe at all. Keep the drama and pain an arms length away seems to work best. After all, I'd have more luck becoming pope than finding a meaningful and loving relationship.

Wow, I'm miserable. Do yourself a favor people and read a new blog.

Continued Reflection

The past three or so weeks have been very difficult for me. I finally said to myself on the walk home today, "dude, a LOT has been going on since November. Give yourself time to adjust and move on with life, your new job and new single status."

I think this week has been the absolute worse for some reason. Not sure why. Poor sleep patterns probably don't help.

Even though I'm sad about the break up and the chaos of my life at the moment, I need to remember that I will find love again and it will be so much better than before. I look forward to meeting that next guy and getting that giddy feeling of anticipation when I see him or the longing to see him again.

Ok, just had to put that out there. Think of my blog as therapy for the time being. Therapy with eye candy attached.

I Will Survive!

Life goes on right? So far, so good. It's been about two weeks since my relationship imploded. And . . . my friends and family seem to be doing much worse with the news/changes than I.

I'm not happy about the pending changes. Moving out angers me so much. It is not easy to find a place with roommates, within my price range that allows for dogs. Cooper is my buddy and coming with me. Someone has to be the responsible pet owner. So yeah, we're still living together for the moment until our lease ends or something like that. That part of the divorce needs to be finalized.

Many parts of me want to write these "sweeping rules" for the future like "never again will I move in so quickly" and "take it slow in the beginning next time . . ." etc. I hope I don't listen to myself. My anger won't be helpful for the future.

God bless my friends and family. They're my rock and have been very supportive. Certainly keeping me sane. This whole break up has inspired me to create new goals and chart a new life path . . .one of which is getting my ass back to the gym! I'll be there forever tomorrow!! lol

Learned a lot in this relationship . . . hurts a lot too . . . especially because I thought I was done with the whole dating pool thing. But, like my friends said, "you can't deal with crazy!" aka my friends referring to dumb ass.

Any who . . . any relationship survival tips? I could use them.


OH!!! And the best news ever!!! My new niece Hailee was born last Saturday night!!! She is so beautiful! Love that kid! Went to meet her on Sunday of last week. Tough drive down. I was so hungover. Was out that night (like all good single gays!) and did shots to celebrate her arrival!

Walls Come Crashing Down

My New Years Eve was shitty. TJ decided to call it quits and end our relationship of 2.5 years. Not going to lie, we had our issues . . . but what couples don't? Shit, some are pretty basic and not major. But he doesn't want to do the heavy lifting necessary to rectify our relationship and work through these issues. This came suddenly. He was never one to communicate this feelings or emotions.

I'm sad and disappointed. Thought he was the one. Thought I was done dating. Thought marriage was in the future (few years away). Well . . . no more.

Cooper (my d0g) and I are looking for a place to live as I'll be moving out as soon as possible. *sigh* The joys of living with your partner. If anyone in Boston is looking for a roommate (please be gay friendly and allow for a dog) let me know.

I know I'll get through this . . . have wonderful friends who are such a great support system. Actually using this to set a bunch of goals for myself for 2011. I'll come out of this stronger (que a song by Beyonce), more self aware and better prepared for the next guy god sends me.

My friends and I will be planning a party to celebrate my return to single hood. Coming to a gay bar near you!

Me and the Men's: Mating Season Part III

Good afternoon from rainy water logged Boston, Massachusetts. The past two days have been dreary, wet and cold. Mother Nature has been bi-polar. I was wearing shorts and a polo last Friday and switched into pants and a sweat shirt the next day. But I digress . .

Well, I know you're waiting for an update from last weeks dates. I've spent a little bit of each day since last Wednesday with T.

Friday night I got out of work late, around 10pm. Rushed home to shower and change, then went to his place. We chilled and watched a few movies...cuddled...made out etc. It was great. He made me brownies too! Got up the next morning and headed to work again, ugh! Later that evening we went to see the movie "Breaking Up With Sarah Marshall". It was really cute. The movie was followed by dinner at Todd English's Fig's Restaurant. We then headed to a str8 bar where a few of his college buddies were hanging out. They had come to town from NY. Let me just say, this bar had to be the sleaziest and trashiest bar I've ever been too! And I've been to some hole in the wall places. T is so cute . . . one drink and he's buzzed and turns red.

Sunday we had a great brunch at this place up the road from my new apartment (picking up the keys on Thursday) and then did a little shopping at Target. We both love that place.

It has all been good . . . I guess I'll see where this goes!

I'm a little grumpy today . . . chalk it up to my lack of sleep (hehe) and being super busy. It hasn't it me yet but tomorrow is my very last day of work. After 6 years! Going away party in the afternoon!

Mating Season Part II - We Meet Again!

Yeah, I'm not a hoe kids .. .lol but I did just get home about 30 minutes ago . . . with enough time to shower and stroll into work only 20 minutes late. hehe

So I did get to see him again. Oh, I need to give him a name for blog purposes....hmm I'll call him "T" for now.

And in case you were wondering, we didn't have sex or anything like that. I'm a good Catholic Boy remember? lol We only played tonsil hockey all night long after going out and into this morning. I think I got about 2 hours of sleep. Dam he is such a good kisser! I didn't want to leave. And lots of cuddling too . . . my fav!

Yesterday we emailed back and forth all day. I've had a huge smile on my face from ear to ear! It's great! Ok, time to get back to work . . . I've got a long 12 + hour day today... bring on the Dunkin Donuts! VpO runs on Dunkin today!

It's Mating Season: Me and the Mens

It's 2:23am in the morning here in Boston . . . and I just got home from a date. And it was AMAZING!

No no, we didn't hook up . . . we just couldn't stop talking and enjoying each others company. God dam I'm beaming right now!

So we met up for dinner at my favorite restaurant in town . . . which happens to also be a fav of his. First impression of him - absolutely adorable! Well put together, great smile, everything!
We have been emailing, texting, and chatting all week long and seem to have a lot in common. He's very much a conversationalist . . . which I love! Because lord knows I never run out of shit to say!

Dinner was awesome and we never ran out of stuff to talk about . . . although it was warm in there....or was it the glass of wine, 80 degree weather and a few nerves? Probably a combo of all three.

After dinner we walked for a bit through the South End of Boston .. . its the gay neighborhood and home to some of the most beautiful tree lined streets of Brownstones. The epitome of Boston architecture and history. I digress . . .

Stopped for some ice cream during our stroll and enjoyed some cute playful banter through out our walk. Since we were having a good time and it was obvious we didn't want to part company, he suggested going back to his place to watch a movie.

And we sat there, cuddled a bit, and chatted until 2am. It was awesome! He walked me out and we kissed good night :-) Hopefully a second date soon!

Is it Possible to NOT Have a Type?

I'm creating a new series here on "the 'burg and the b-room key". Yeah, that's the short name or "ACBK".

Any who, the series shall be called "Me and the Men's" and it will chronicle my triumphs, tribulations, insecurities, and thoughts when it comes to sex, dating, and men. I'll create a little special label too. I know you're all seething with anticipation, just keep it together mmkay?

So, is it possible to NOT have a type? You know what I'm talking about right? You can always hear someone say "oh he's so my type" or "you'd so do him!". I look at all of my friends and they pretty much have a type. Me, I'm willing to declare, looks wise, that I do not have a type. And when I mean type, I'm more talking about the physical attributes ones looks for in a potential bf of partner.

For example, my friend Mitch. He likes tall, skinny, well educated guys, who wear glasses and turtlenecks. Kind of the "dorky/nerdy look" (his words, not mine). Blond hair & blue eyes a plus! Oh and if he has a degree from an Ivy league school or top 10 institution, he's hard. (He's so going to kill me when he reads this).

Even the breeders have types. My brother always said he liked brunettes or women with brown hair. There are a few other characteristics, but I can't remember what those were. Either way, I know my sister in law met those. They are kinda perfect for each other.

When it comes to the physical side of men, I don't think I have a type. Granted, now that I think about it, every guy except for one that I've dated or hooked up with had black hair. I mean, I often say to myself, "oh yeah, guys with dark features i.e. olive skin, black/brown hair, brown eyes etc. are wicked hot and drive me wild". But then a hottie with blond or dirty blond hair, blue/green/hazel eyes walks by and I'm like "god dam!"

I think it may be possible that at the moment, I don't have a "type". I'm not sure why I think this is true. I just asked SAM, who is sitting across from me as I type this (say hi SAM) if I have a type. She says I do . . . but can't articulate it. Interesting.

What are your thoughts readers? Do you have a type?

Maxi & Foxi, I'm looking forward to you two bitches weighing in!

Btw, Boston, yeah - ice berg!