JP Calderon

JP Calderon, Survivor cast member, model, and now OUT gay man has adorned this blog once before. He was the last desktop favorite of the week. I wanted to blog a little bit more about him because I actually just read the article from Instinct Magazine in which he came out to all in their February 2007 edition. The picture to the right is him on the cover. Sexy right?

For those who didn't know, JP came out in the magazine...he apparently was not out to everyone. Congrats are in order because coming out is NEVER easy.

It disturbs me when I read about Hollywood actors or other celebrity types being forced out of the closet and into the limelight. Who the fuck are you to force someone out of the closet? Yes, it is great that as a society, we have become better received and achieved greater acceptance. That aside, its still a scary world out there - even out of the closet.

Some ask if it is acceptable to out public officials or celebrities. I say no. As much as being out is better than being in the closet, everyone needs to come out on their own time and their own terms. The psychological and emotional stress is terrible and if you don't have the social network to comfort and support you during the rough times then its all the more difficult.

But back to JP. What's interesting is that he just came out at age 31 (I bring up age, because studies now say that people come out much younger now, like age 12!). To me, that shows that regardless of how much progress we've made, not everyone is in a comfortable position to shout from the roof tops that they're a 'mo. Oh, btw, JP was not outed by the magazine. Just wanted to put that out there.

While reading the interview, I was reminded of my childhood (early and late), and how difficult it was to grow up gay. Living in fear, hiding your secret, hoping that hot guy in gym class didn't think you were checking him out. I really think thats why I hated gym so much. Especially swim class. I'd always look at the ground instead of looking up.

On the flip side...being out of the closet is SOOO MUCH BETTER! I remember the first person I told... a nun at the counseling center at school. I was so relieved and had such a weight lifted off my shoulders . . . I felt like I might float away. Being out produces greater self esteem, confidence, happiness, excitement, and makes it easier to meet others - romantic or other wise.

So come out, come out where ever you . . . but on your own time and terms!